She wasn't completely green, but here in the Cardiovascular Intensive Care Unit she looked like a sprig of grass in a desert. Sarah walked into the nurses break room and there they they all sat, just staring at her--the night shift nurses. Sarah was never the typical nurse in her mind. She was tall and not exactly slender. Her bleach blonde hair was showing her darker roots underneath. Her long legs were halted by her longer feet, all-in-all she was not a tiny, cute, quintessential nurse--she was anything but.
The faces on the nurses in the break room ranged from distrust to disinterest. Sarah froze only two steps inside the break room. She looked at all their faces and didn't see one friend. Eventually they all resumed their private conversations and Sarah walked back to the lockers. On Sarah's first day of orientation, no one had bothered to tell her which lockers were available so Sarah had opened random lockers until she found an empty one. Today, she fumbled her stethoscope out of her purse and her pens. Pens were Sarah's favorite, all types of colors, all types of ink, she had to have them. Today, her first day, she had five pens in her pocket with them clipped over the edge of the pocket hem. Her locker was bare as she stared into it taking a deep breath. Day one Sarah, just don't do anything stupid and ask questions, Sarah thought.
"Hey! First day off orientation. Are you totally excited?" Judy came out of no where and patted Sarah on the back.
"Well, excited is one word for it," Sarah replied. Sarah looked at Judy with mixed feelings. Judy had been Sarah's preceptor for her first few weeks, on nights, at the CVICU. All Sarah cared to remember about the orientation was how Type A Judy was. Judy had a system for everything and Sarah had tried to learn but there was only so much learning Sarah could do with Judy constantly on her back watching and questioning everything she did. Ultimately, Sarah kept her mouth shut and just tried to get through orientation without having a panic attack around Judy.
"You're going to be fine Sarah, just come find me if you need any help." Judy walked back to the table where all the nurses sat waiting for the time clock to read 7:00 PM. Sarah closed her locker and stood behind the table of nurses trying to appear as small as possible. She looked at the time clock, 6:53 PM.
"It's time everyone!" Sandra, a black nurse exclaimed as she rose from her chair and pulled out her badge to swipe into the time clock.
Sarah grabbed a spot in the line forming to clock in and swiped her badge. Time punch 6:53PM, here we go Sarah, she thought to herself, only seven minutes before her first solo shift began.
I am going to be fine. I am fresh off orientation, how bad could this really be?
